How To Be A Better Ally

June, and everywhere we see rainbow flags and rainbow clothes and rainbow frogs. June, the time of pride, the month for recognition of the LGBTQ+ community. Suddenly there is special pride goodies, all the apps are rainbow coloured, there are parades and all that jazz. Pride month may be a special month for the people belonging to the community, but those who aren’t a part of it need to use this time to finally accept them as a part of the society. But do you already think that you’re accepting enough, or that you’re already what is said to be an ‘ally’? If you put up a rainbow flag on your Instagram story and think you play your part as an ally, think again. Allies are super loved in the community, the people who use their cishet privilege to spread awareness and celebrate the colours of pride are truly gems. But if rainbow flags and merely being comfortable with the whole concept of guys kissing guys isn’t what makes you an ally, then what does? Here’s how you can become a better ally.

The first step is always and always going to be educating yourself. You may know what all the letters stand for in LGBTQ+, but don’t ignore than ‘+’ sign there too. That tiny little plus sign represents the end number of sexualities and gender identities, which are usually ignored by not just cishets but by the people of the community as well. Learning about the ‘micro-labels’, such as omnisexual, demigender, demisexual etc., can help you understand people who use these micro-labels better and plays a great role in accepting them. Moreover, educating yourself about gender identities and experiences of the people of the community can help in overcoming the various stigmas surrounding them.

Talking about stigmas, which started years ago by people in the past. We may overcome them, but people who grew up with them would have a hard time. A big part of being an ally includes spreading awareness. Start this by talking about educating your families. But, talking to adults in the house about the LGBTQ+ community is…kind of scary, right? They’d think you’re weird, right? This is exactly what people face when coming out the closet, the fear of unacceptance and abandonment—yes, abandonment by their own family—is always there. People go years and years never telling anyone about their true selves until it’s too late. This is exactly why spreading awareness, simply talking is so important.

Before we get onto the next step, repeat after me.

TRANS MEN ARE MEN AND TRANS WOMEN ARE WOMEN.

Now that it’s out of the way, let’s move on.

Generally, the everyday language used by us doesn’t tend to be very inclusive. Using terms like “ladies and gentlemen” or “guys and gals” completely leaves out non-binary and intersex folks. Instead, use terms like “y’all” or “folks” or “peeps”. They aren’t just fun to use, but also inclusive. When talking about people with specific genitalia, using terms like “people who can get pregnant” or “people who can impregnate” can help you be more inclusive. Making your everyday language is a way to show that you’re supportive of the community and that you accept them as a part of the community as well.

Every pride month, large companies release special pride goodies or add some rainbow into their logos to show their support. However, these companies only do it for the crowd and are in reality, not supportive of the community. This queerbaiting done by companies is problematic as they only look upon the LGBTQ+ community as a marketing strategy. Rather than supporting these large firms by buying their products, support small businesses run by people of the community. Help them grow, use their products and don’t be a part of the queerbaiting done by the huge firms.

Pride month, pride parades, and pride marches are a step by people of the LGBTQ+ community and allies towards acceptance and equality. This pride month don’t simply celebrate pride prides with your gay friends. Pride month leads us directly to the Stonewall Riots of 1969 in New York City, where people belonging to the community, predominately people of colour, rioted back against the police which led to a riot of four whole days. Learning about LGBTQ+ history is essential, people because of whom pride is now celebrated shouldn’t be simply forgotten.

Pride month celebrates the colours and equality of people who love different. Love is love, and love is beautiful. As an ally, accept the love. Just because people love different doesn’t make them different, it doesn’t make them weak or longing for support. But they need equality, and using the cishet privilege in the right way is how you can help too. Like, come on, there are bigger problems than boys who kiss boys and girls who kiss girls.